SPACE, FUN or maybe TIME

Hi..

It's been a while i haven't say a thing here in this blog. For sure i want to update it but there has been so many things going on and to be honest, I kept on thinking about things thats happening this week. At the same time, i kept on thinking about space, fun and time maybe.. I don't really know why i think of it.. Oh wait! I do. It's because i feel so drown with stress and thinking so many things. I can't stand it. I really can't.
I miss home. I miss Btho for god sake and even though i don't have THAT much friends back in Cheras, some how i miss the atmosphere there guys. I miss my 5 Prima's girls to be exact. I know i'm not close with any of them but there is something in my heart thats making me miss them.

Plus guys. like i said. I need space.A space for me to breath and not think of anything else. A space for me to cry, smile or just be me. I miss it guys. I miss being alone in some way but at the same time i miss having someone there beside me everytime when i need someone to play around with and just being the foolish me. I know i got my friends. My awesome loving girls and ashen as he is one of the guys in college that can make me laugh like crazy and always make me feel a bit better when i'm sad or doubting myself.

Other then that, I wanna have fun. I know, i'm not the 'fun' person . Really i'm not..Except the part where i can be a bit hyper then thats a different story, because at that time i'll be a bit talkative and childish in a way. Then again i can be a bit ' manja ' too because thats me, the TRUE me in a way. haha. I try to be a 'fun' person but i can't because i've been a serious and boring person for so long. But at some point i wanna have fun. I do. It's just that i have to do the fun stuff that i like and not the stuff that other people wants me to do or forcing me to do it. I like having fun in away that it doesn't involve in hurting other people's feeling. Like last night, i WAS thinking of updating this blog but i got caught up skyping with Ashen because i still owe him one story. It was fun talking to him and just being my silly self despite the fact that i was sick in the middle of the night. ( to be honest this is what i call having a bit of fun: Spending a moment with a friend)

Anyway, then just maybe..I wanna have a bit of time to think something else other then about my life and what's gonna happen sooner nor later. Actually to be frank i'm tired of thinking about every possible thing and i hate analyzing stuff that would eventually make me sad. I know i know, you guys would say " since when she start analyzing stuff? " hermm my answer to that is..well I don't know * hee* but i've been analyzing and just looking at peoples behaviour and it's quite interesting in a way. but then again, i am surrounded by people who likes to analyze things.haha. Herm i know i have a LOT of time to myself and i've been using it to think about my life and my course and just stressing the hell outta myself and i think , scratch that, I KNOW that i need that time of releasing everything and think of something else.

I don't know guys. sometimes i do think that i do over think stuff and sometimes i do agree that i think a lot. But i can't stop it because thats me and ITS me. I just hope this RAYA holiday i can get all this that i want. SPACE, FUN or maybe TIME =')